- and now you know!

Just sitting here quietly before work… Thinking like always.  Sometimes it is really difficult to understand how I got where I am, sometimes I wish it weren’t the case – and other times I am uncertain if any place else is better anyway.  There is always that nagging feeling inside of me wishing I could go back and fix things but I have to tune it out and realize it wasn’t really my fault.  Perhaps it wasn’t worth it at all anyway.  I cannot recall a happier time in my life than those moments back then, but they’re all gone and even if there were some way to recreate them it would never be the same again.  Roads were traversed against my advisory – roads I can’t follow down.  So I go on, each day blending into the next – of course I think about the past constantly but it’s gone.  I speak very vague when I write, but the only person in the world who would understand this is probably the last person who would ever read it.  I hope you’re happy, I really do.  I just think there was another way once upon a time, that was better – now it’s gone and so am I.